About three years ago I made two wonder friends, let's call them Jane and Wendy. We are all really tight and did many crazy and sporadic things together. Over time near the end of 2011 Wendy suspected that Jane was lying about multiple things and was "going crazy" because she let a boyfriend (who wasn't the best influence) get in the way of the important things in her life. A lot of nasty things went down between us three. I could ramble on and on about this like I have to trusting friends and family in the past--but I am done with that. Long story short, Wendy and I lost a lot of trust in Jane and stopped hanging out with her. There was a lot more tension between Jane and Wendy than me and Jane, but nonetheless, the tension did dampen the friendship between Jane and I. Jane claimed that Wendy was a "toxic friend" and lost all touch with her. She kept in touch with me with the occasional FB comment on my statuses or photos, but not anything more than that. I kept in touch with Wendy.
A year has passed by and I haven't spoken directly to Jane in a year. Every time I talk to Wendy she will talk to me about her regrets and disappointment in Jane. I always listen to her and respect her feelings. Today Wendy came over to my house to visit. In the middle of talking to Wendy I got a call from an unknown phone number. I answered and it was Jane. She wanted to talk to me and catch up. I told her I would call her back because it caught me so off guard to be honest. It threw Wendy off too. After Wendy left I told my mom that Jane called and my mom told me that she actually ran into Jane's mom and sister last week at the mall. Jane's mom explained to my mom that Jane has fallen into a deep depression and is not doing very well at all.
As I was getting ready for bed tonight I began to reflect on the whole situation between Jane, Wendy, and I. I suddenly felt an impression from the spirit: I love Wendy and I love Jane. God loves all of His children, there is good in everyone. I suddenly felt extremely stupid for ever being mad at Jane. She is HUMAN, she makes mistakes just like me and just like anyone else on the entire planet. I suddenly felt the urge to be like Jesus and my Heavenly Father and forget all of the things that Jane did "wrong" and just show her love. After I brushed my teeth and hopped into bed I sent her a text saying: Hey Jane. Sorry I couldn't talk earlier today, I've had a busy day. But I will call you tomorrow! I miss you and I love you."
I came to the realization today that staying mad at someone is stupid. It is okay to be mad at someones actions for little spurts of time I suppose. But there comes a time when we all just need to take a deep breath, count to 5, forgive, and love. President Monson once said:
“The spirit must be freed from tethers so strong and feelings never put to rest, so that the lift of life may give buoyancy to the soul. In many families, there are hurt feelings and a reluctance to forgive. It doesn’t really matter what the issue was. It cannot and should not be left to injure. Blame keeps wounds open. Only forgiveness heals. George Herbert, an early 17th-century poet, wrote these lines: ‘He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven, for everyone has need of forgiveness.’”
Jesus commanded us to love one another as he loves us. It's about time I really take that to heart. I make a new New Years Resolution to love everyone as much as possible. If I have something bad to say about another, I should shut my face and write down 3 things I love about them. If God can love all of the people of the world, we should too. I finish with a quote from Joseph B Wirthlin:
"Nothing you do makes much of a difference if you do not have charity. You can speak with tongues, have the gift of prophecy, understand all mysteries, and possess all knowledge; even if you have the faith to move mountains, without charity it won't profit you at all....
"Without charity—or the pure love of Christ—whatever else we accomplish matters little. With it, all else becomes vibrant and alive.
"When we inspire and teach others to fill their hearts with love, obedience flows from the inside out in voluntary acts of self-sacrifice and service" (Ensign, Nov 2007, 28–31).
"Without charity—or the pure love of Christ—whatever else we accomplish matters little. With it, all else becomes vibrant and alive.
"When we inspire and teach others to fill their hearts with love, obedience flows from the inside out in voluntary acts of self-sacrifice and service" (Ensign, Nov 2007, 28–31).
To anyone who has actually taken the time to read this, I thank you and hope that you will be inspired to love and forgive those who have offended you in any way. And to those who you find annoying or difficult. No offense...but shut your face and count to 5. You don't know them as well as you think you do. Quit judging and forgive and love.
Love Kenna
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